Wednesday, December 10, 2014

"be happy with what you have."

there's a church en route to work, and the sign out front always has some cut-and-dry, damn good advice posted up on it.. that seems to always be ironically directed at me and what's going on in my life at the moment. though i'm always on the bus as i pass, i never think to snap a shot not to forget what it says. but this one, this one i must remember..

"be happy with what you have."

i haven't been feeling myself lately. i can't say that it's the weather because i love the weather here, but maybe even that can't save me from the 'SAD'. maybe i'm just annoyed. there's girls in my house, two of them sharing a room for a month. and they're taking up everything... i forgot how-uhh-challenging.. living with females is. [i was so not meant to be one..] bathroom, kitchen, if i need it, they're in it. guaranteed. i gotta pee, i need a shower, and i'm bloody starving with that post-work hunger. and just now, i've had to move to the living room to type because i lost the only plug in my bedroom to a blow-out due to the girl's hair dryer. like fuckin really? it must be me... maybe that just happened right now because i forgot to be happy with what i damn well have. that and it's an old house... but you know.

sometimes i forget how lucky i am to have a place to go with a warm bed. it costs more than half of what i make a month to maintain, but still.. i have it. i tend to forget that even though i'm thousands of miles away from pretty well everyone i know, if i really need someone to talk to all i have to do is pick up the phone. i might be going through hug withdrawals, and i might spend the majority of my time alone, but i do have friends. they're out there, the best ones.

i am happy with what i have. i'm damn grumpy because i'm tired all the time, working midnights and failing at sleep. but i like my job for what it is, could use a higher wage to get some groceries up in here, but i dig the people, and the challenge. it'll get me through the next little while. eight weeks from now i'll be on the road again, cramped in on buses for days, hitting multiple cities and crashing couches in the dead of winter with zero income. so until then i'll have to appreciate my overpriced, not-so-par space on the hill for what it is, a safe place to lay my head. that said, it's still far better than places i've been.

there's still power in my house, just not my part of it for now. that's fine.. at least it's still accessible. there's still hot running water, which i plan to soak up soon. and there's still the mountains, and the sub-tropical climate, and new places to explore. i still have my sanity, mostly. i'm quickly realizing how spoiled i have been by having all of these modern conveniences at my fingertips most of the time i've been here, which is a switch-up for me. i'm more used to tenting it, bunking, couch surfing, and hunting for public power sources to charge my phone. laundry and showers were more of an occasion. this is nothing, and something.

well now that i've managed to express my gratitudes whilst complaining about my petty discomforts, it's about time i prepare to get some rest. 27 hours is a long time to be awake, and i do that far too often. i'd better get going while it's still storming because there will be no netflix to lull my head to sleep, only the sound of the rain. [for that, i can't complain.]

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