Tuesday, June 14, 2016
i love Wednesdays. it's hard work. playing in the dirt. the sun. planting, pruning, snacking, laughing.. making some decent loot. it's using every muscle in my body. lift, bend, dig, climb, haul. it's epic views. the smell of the ocean twenty feet from the shore. the rain up on the side of the mountain. since i moved to BC, it's been my favourite day of the week.
it's been my only constant. everything else has changed several times over. i've had four other jobs, lived in several places [or no place at all], had many friends come [close] and go [far, far away], experienced varying levels of health and sickness, love and loss, been ballin' and broke [especially the latter].. Wednesday was the one thing i could count on no matter the circumstance.
i want more. more garden time. more working for someone local and independent who actually gives a shit, rather than being a number in a box. something more fulfilling. something i can be proud of when i leave for the day. more hard work that feels like play. more outside with better pay.
i'm on the hunt.
the grass doesn't care what you dress like. the weeds give zero shits if you're having a bad day. head down, music on, and work the hours away. the arborscapes absorb my anger. the sweat always hides my tears. and when i have something to smile about, the flowers melt away my fears.
i need this for my sanity.
that and.. if i don't make something happen real soon, me arse be back out on the street. i have some leads. just gotta keep my shit together to make it happen. it's hard to get out of bed sometimes. to leave the house.. now that i'm in one. it's hard to maintain a balance. to not become anxious when it's time to walk out the door. to be confident the world won't crush me. or my mind or my heart..
but it's Wednesday tomorrow. my favourite day of the week. rain or shine. the soil calls me.